It's been almost a couple of decades now since I attended my first play party with my Dominant. Munches were required to make it to a BDSM party - even then - but for fit young women it was overlooked. My first kink event which was an experience in the unknown. A bit of fear, but that was laden over with pure adulterated arousal.
My Dominant at the time was new, and more people were willing to watch him flounder and then swoop in and gullet me up than to help. Which is a shame - he was a good Dominant with decent instincts. I learned this was quite common between Dominants in BDSM subcultures.
As it would turn out, teaching the equipment of a Dominant is a lot easier than teaching the skills of one. There's not very many people who are willing, and even less who are able to even do it well. Perhaps they are afraid of creating their own competition, egos worrying about the student becoming better than the teacher, or even simple jealousy. But BDSM is a fun thing, and one can't be faulted if they want to spend their fun time how they want it. No one is obligated to help.
With no one obligated to help, how then does someone learn the basics? This was my questions back then. And I've seen that same call for help many times in the years since. Yes...what you just read was my "when I was your age" story.
There are all kinds of ways of learning how to use a flogger, or tie a column tie, or any number of other things. That's the easy stuff - and I might get to that stuff some day. The 'nails and screws' of BDSM.
For now though, I'm looking forward to helping people learn why you would pick one over the other. We Dominants are all different of course, and I have no interest in telling anyone the 'right' way of practising BDSM. Let me guide you to figuring out what kind of Dominant you are, and what to do with that information. Stick around and learn, for those new to the role or those with years of experience.
Stay tuned while I update my services section! I will be offering individual coaching, webinars, and training programs. http://www.upkink.com/services
There you go...intention setting first post down. Now onto more useful stuff!